Funny Woman Jokes

A little joke of the day June 11, 2010 to make you women giggle

Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.
One woman said, "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does."

The second woman giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft."

The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friend asked, "Say, what do you call your husband?"

She frowned and said, "The postman."

"Why the postman?"

"Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."

Funny Jokes about women for June 9, 2010
Just some jokes about our ladies. I do so many men ones that I figured it was time to turn the tables a bit LOL Here you go

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."

How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough
to build up the required pressure.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.

I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.


Funny Woman Joke of the Day- June 8, 2010

Three women are discussing their teenage daughters.

The first declares: "I was so shocked last week. I was tidying my daughter's room and I found a packet of cigarettes under her pillow. I didn't even know that she smoked!"

"It gets worse than that," says the second mother. "I was tidying my daughter's room last week and I found a bottle of vodka under her bed. I didn't even know that she drank!"

"Oh, it gets even worse than that," says the third mother. "I was tidying my daughter's room last week and you'll never guess what I found in her bedside cabinet: a packet of condoms!"

I didn't even know that she had a penis!



Funny Woman Joke of the day- June 6, 2010

The Nagging Wife
Farmer Frank had a nagging wife who made his life miserable. The only real peace that he got was when he was out in the field plowing.

One day when he was out in the field, Frank's wife brought his lunch to him. Then she stayed while he quietly ate and berated him with a constant stream of nagging and complaining. Suddenly, Frank's old mule kicked up his back legs, striking the wife in the head, and killing her instantly.

At the wake, Frank's minister noticed that when the women offered their sympathy to Frank he would nod his head up and down. But when the men came up and spoke quietly to him, he would shake his head from side to side.

When the wake was over and all the mourners had left, the minister approached Frank and asked, "Why was it that you nodded your head up and down to all the women and shook your head from side to side to all the men?"

Well, Frank replied, "The women all said how nice she looked, and her dress was so pretty, so I agreed by nodding my head up and down. The men all asked, 'Is that mule for sale!?'"

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